Day 1: May 9, 2017
I have decided to document my depression. This is day 1. Today, I have felt physically and mentally sick. All of my cells in my body, but especially my arms, felt like they were vibrating. Actually vibrating. I could feel them moving around in my body. It was not pleasant. I did not have my sense of humor that I normally do. I was extremely short with those that were around me. I could feel my mind trying to collapse and I still feel it. I have not succumbed though. I have not allowed my mind to collapse, at least not yet. I have procrastinated a lot of things that I say I will get to tomorrow. I really hope I do. What I want to do is lay in bed and not be disturbed, but I am a teacher and students depend on me to be at school. Most days lately I don't feel like I am adequate teacher and that I am failing the students. I know that I am not giving my all like I used to. I can't. I can't get myself to do that. I have tried and there is just a part of me that won&#